Tonight was rough, y’all. I didn’t parent very well and my boy cried a couple of times. It’s days like this that I feel like I don’t know what I’m doing. But, then I get an “I love you” at bedtime and I’m thankful for second chances in parenting.
My boy is known throughout our little town for his smile. He has an award winning smile with his little baby teeth and the gap between his top two teeth. He gets compliments everywhere we go on that smile and I am asked on a daily basis if he smiles like this all the time. My answer is almost always “yes, he wakes up with that smile on his face” because honestly, he does. My boy loves life and loves our little family.
But sometimes, things go wrong at home.
Sometimes thing go wrong at the Y after school, but that’s another story.
Tonight, things went wrong at home and I disappointed my boy over and over.
I talked yesterday about my workaholic love of my 2.5 jobs, right? Well, work got in the way of my being a good parent tonight. I had some extra work that I needed to get done (that honestly could have waited, but I wasn’t letting it wait) and I let that interfere with my time with the family.
It started as soon as we got home and I went straight to the computer. I needed to get some CL work done and I tried to send my boy off to play by himself. His best friend from across the street (who moved to Florida last year) is home visiting and he was bugging me to call or text their mom to see if he could play. Only the mom had already told us that the kids were in the back field with their dad and she would call him, but she couldn’t guarantee that he would come up for the kids to play. He was stressing over seeing his friend and bugging me over and over. There was nothing I could do so I just kept working while he went from the window to the door until it got too dark for him to see.
Then it was time for dinner (and this was my only score as a parent) and Howard is sick so I took Benjamin out for pizza at his favorite buffet restaurant. I even gave him play money to play games after he ate his dinner. Life was good for a few minutes while we were there.
We came home and he went to his room, but then he came out crying because he wanted to play with his friend and he wanted to find a missing stuffed animal that we lost a few weeks ago. I held him for a second while he cried and Howard found the “brother” to the missing animal. Benjamin eventually calmed down and took a bath. He felt a little better after his shower and bath and then it was time for bed.
As I was tucking him into bed, he said “night night Mommy, I love you” and I knew all was forgiven. I don’t know what I would do without second chances in parenting because I make these same mistakes over and over almost on a daily basis. I guess at least I didn’t yell tonight so that’s a good thing…
So, today I’m thankful for second chances in parenting and hopefully I can continue to learn from my mistakes and do just a little better next time.
Join me on my journey to write 30 days of thankfulness in the month of November for NaBloPoMo and follow my hashtag – #CrazyThankful – to find out what I’m thankful for this month and all year long!