I always knew I would be a mom. I’ve always wanted to be a mom. I never thought about whether I would be the mom to a boy or a girl and kinda just figured I would have one of each and life would be balanced. I never dreamed I would be the mom to one, the mom to a boy only, and I never thought I would be giving out advice as a boy mom.
But, here I am, a mom to one super silly seven year old boy, with all the glory of farts and dirt and crazy smells, and it’s about time that I start sharing my experiences and my advice, my own flavor of boy mom quips and lists and references that have helped me along the way. I’m not reinventing the wheel and I may not be saying anything that hasn’t been said before, but I’m putting my own words to it and I’m writing to my type of boy mom friends. Those of us with just one boy or who never really prepared ourselves for the boy mom status. I hope you come along with me and add your own advice as well. It’s a roller coaster, y’all, so let’s throw our hands up and enjoy the ride!
My boy has the biggest heart, y’all know that, and I want to help him grow that heart into a man-sized heart full of love. I want to learn his love language and fill his bucket every day. I have so much I want to tell him before he gets too old to listen, before I get too old to tell him, and definitely before he loses his big, bright smile and healthy, loving heart.
In this new series, “Mom to Boy”, I’ll start with the top 10 things I want my son to know.
- Those pretty girls deserve your smiles. Y’all know that my boy goes goo-goo over a pretty girl. He loves girls in bows and just pretty girls, in general. When he sees a pretty girl, he smiles his biggest smile and treats them with a kindness that is way beyond his years. To my boy – keep smiling at those pretty girls without any ulterior motive, just smile and do it out of the kindness of your own heart. And to those girls that don’t feel pretty, smile even bigger at them because all girls deserve to see your smile.
- Respect yourself. Throughout years of growing up and living life, we all come across the challenges that may lead us to disrespect ourselves in one way or another. Life is hard, folks, and I don’t want to hide that from my boy, but I do want him to know that just because life may be cruel, we always have the opportunity to love ourselves and treat ourselves with kindness. To my boy – stay respectful of yourself first and treat yourself with kindness and you will be successful in one way or another.
- Listen. My boy is a talker, big time. He loves to tell stories and talk about his dreams and thoughts. I want him to know that life is also about listening, whether it be listening to your parents, teachers, friends, or significant other. To my boy – slow down from time to time and really listen. I’m not saying you’ll be a follower, but be a listener when it really matters.
- Speak when it’s your turn. We’ve established that my boy can talk, but when it really matters, he can be a little bashful. I want him to speak up and speak his mind when it’s time. To my boy – develop your opinions and your convictions and speak up when it counts.
- No means no. Bottom line. No matter where it comes from, this is the final answer. To my boy – learn to listen and when you hear no, that’s the end of the line.
- Being silly is normal and fun. Yep, folks, my super silly seven year old has been super silly since he was seven DAYS old! It’s in his nature and it’s okay. To my boy – be yourself and have fun in life. There’s a time to be serious and you’ll know when it is that time. Otherwise, you just keep doing you and the world will love you.
- Laugh as often as you can. It’s the medicine that will cure almost every ailment in your heart. Laughter brings the world together and my boy is good at it. To my boy – laugh it up, boy, and you’ll have a wonderful life. It’s how your dad and I make it through the rough times and it works wonders.
- Take your time and do it right the first time. We will all make mistakes in life, but if we learn from them, then we can do it right the next time. If we slow down and do it right the first time, things will just run more smoothly. To my boy – mistakes are okay, but if you slow down and focus, I know you can do it right the first time…or at least learn from your mistakes and do it right the second first time.
- Hold onto that love in your heart. My boy’s heart is huge and warm and loving and I hope he never changes. To my boy – don’t change who you are no matter what life deals you.
- Honor God and His will. No more explanation needed. To my boy – this is how your dad and I are trying to raise you so follow His word and you just can’t go wrong.
So, yeah, it’s a little cliché and it’s very much sappy, but it’s where I needed to start in my letters to my boy. It’s what I need him to know whenever he is able to understand it. To my boy – I love you, always have, always will, and I hope you have a happy, fulfilling, successful life.