There's a small stir around Mommy bloggers at the moment and I thought I would take a moment to talk about my feelings on this – bear with me because I have so many racing thoughts that I want to share…
When I saw the cover of Time magazine featuring Jamie Grumet, I was taken in by the shock value that I'm sure was marketing strategies at it's best. As I read deeper into the reasoning (and the story) behind it, I feel proud to be a mom and proud for the ability to be free to choose how you raise your children, and proud to be a part of this Mommy blogger community that is rallying to report how they are Mom Enough!!
I have not read the article in full, but the gist of it is Jamie explaining her decision to practice Attachment Parenting and features a picture of her breast feeding her three year old son. The cover features bold letters asking, "ARE YOU MOM ENOUGH", which has struck a cord with moms all over the blogosphere. There is so much in this world today that feed into mommy guilt that this cover and title is ingenious on one hand (seriously, how many people are looking, writing, and talking about this right now?!) and unfortunate on the other hand (I feel guilt enough as it is!!).
I ask myself on a daily basis if I'm doing "enough" for my son, but deep inside I know that whether it is "enough" in the eyes of someone else or not, it is ALL I can do and it is "enough" in my son's eyes…and THAT is "enough"!!
When my son was born, he did not breast feed immediately. The nurses told me they would get some help for me so I should rest and they would bring my boy to me after the doctor checked him out. I had been up for over 30 hours at that point so I fell asleep. I woke up when they told me I had to move rooms because they ran out of birthing rooms, but then fell asleep again. I remember waking at about 4am (he was born at 10:37pm) and panicking because I had not seen him again. I asked the nurse if I could try to feed him again and they told me they had given him sugar water because he was hungry and I hadn't fed him…wha-what?!! Then they proceeded to tell me that they did not have enough staff to bring him to me so I walked across the hospital to the nursery to get him and kept him in my room for the remainder of our stay.
I was livid!!
He was able to breastfeed with bottle supplements for the first two months before I had to go back to work. I pumped for him for another month, but I just couldn't keep up and I felt I had done the best I could. Do I wish I could have gone longer? Yes!! Do I feel guilty for stopping? No way!!
Do I wish that he slept in his own bed? Sometimes!!
Do I take steps to transition him? Nope!!
I work full time outside the home and I am the primary breadwinner of our family. I worked up until the day I gave birth (mostly because he was three weeks early and I wasn't expecting it) and I only stayed home for two months after he was born.
Do I wish that I had more time with him sometimes? Yes!!
Do I want to be a stay-at-home mom? Absolutely NOT!!
I have to admit that I am in AWE of stay at home moms, home schooling moms, work at home moms…and anyone who spends their entire day every day with their own children or someone else's children!! I love my child more than life itself, but neither of us want to be together 24/7 and FOR US it's healthy for us to have time together and apart.
One final thought:
I have worked in the Child Abuse field for almost eight years and moms (in their children's eyes) are ALWAYS enough!!
Here are a few reasons I feel that I AM MOM ENOUGH:
♦ I worry about my child non-stop ♦ I pray for my child daily ♦ I love my child's father unconditionally ♦ I work on my marriage every single day so that my child can have a complete family ♦ I brag on my child daily ♦ I teach my child to give to others ♦ I stand up for my child when he has been wronged ♦
I also asked around to some of my Mom Blogger friends and here is why they are MOM ENOUGH:
I am #momenough to fight tooth and nail to see that my child with #specialneeds gets the support she requires in life/at home and at school. – Thrifty Momma's Tips
I am definitely not perfect but I love my daughter – she is a happy good girl. We might not have every toy, gadget, or cool clothing but we have real love in our home. I am mom enough! – Long Wait for Isabella
I'm mom enough to admit that my kid has fur…and poops on the grass. – Woof Woof Mama
I am Mom enough because I'm a Mom, Grandmom, business woman, blogger, daughter, sister, caretaker….and Im still sane. POW – Marg's World
I am psychic, have eyes in the back of my head, and I am always guessing what my sons next move will be before he does. I lost weight just by bouncing my son around in my arms to put him to sleep, but gained it right back from stress after he learned to walk. Most of all, I can easily carry my toddler, hot coffee, diaper bag, my purse, and 3 bags of groceries up a staircase with 30 or more steps. – MamaNYC
Tell me now – Are you MOM ENOUGH?
— Going Crazy Wanna Go (@JanetGoingCrazy) May 12, 2012
Are u "Mom Enough."Join the anti-#mommywar movement and tell us how you are #MOMENOUGH bit.ly/J4afYm #timemagazine @DonnaReedSteph
— mommabrown08 (@mommabrown08) May 11, 2012
I am #MomEnough to raise my child to the best of my ability with confidence and conviction in my choices.
— Kristie Benson (@beekristie) May 12, 2012
FACT: Mommy Wars Do Not Exist -> @Time please take note ->5minutesformom.com/55755/mommy-wa… #MomEnough #parenting
— 5minutesformom (@5minutesformom) May 11, 2012
An Open Letter to #Moms. I think every one of you is FABULOUS. Happy #MothersDay to the moms of the world >> bit.ly/Jm1Dmg #MomEnough
— stephanie anderson (@DonnaReedSteph) May 12, 2012
Tell me now – Are you MOM ENOUGH? Leave me a comment telling my why!!